For sm_monthly

Title: Too Late For You and Your White Horse
Author: Starsea
Theme: Kaidou
Genre: Angst/Drama
Version: Manga (post Stars)
Rating: PG

(with thanks to alizep for beta'ing and general feedback)

( I was a dreamer before you and you let me down )

So I had a nice day yesterday, even though I had to work and forgot to check which shift I'm on next week, because everybody wished me Happy Birthday and the GIF (Guy I Fancy) was even more charming than usual and made me laugh so much. Also, I bought pink wafers, which he apparently loves. Today I didn't really do much because my friends were either busy or too far away, but I got a call last night from my two oldest friends, and we giggled over the phone at each other and they said we should get married because we've now known each other for 20 years, which is longer than most marriages nowadays. Today I bought myself: TWO pairs of shoes with HEELS (one pair are green suede and the other pair are black leather); Monster House; the latest Death Cab for Cutie album; Shaun the Sheep for my dad's Christmas present and the last two DVDs of the Fruits Basket anime. Who thought up the title for no 3? Puddles of Memories? Excuse me while I roll my eyes. Speaking of uninspiring titles, I found out the title of the next Indiana Jones movie: The Cave of the Crystal Skull. My hopes and expectations for this movie evaporated in a puff of smoke on hearing it. The Crystal Skull?What's that supposed to do? Refract blinding bits of colour? -_- Of course, I'll still watch it because I want to see what it's about but maaaaaaaan. I have the same feeling I got after hearing Episode I: The Phantom Menace.

I found a theme song for Takehiko: Same Mistake by James Blunt (available on All The Lost Souls). SERIOUSLY, people, this describes his mindset perfectly (at least where I'm at right now).

Oh, and I'm halfway through writing Chapter 7 of Exiles. :)

I began writing Chapter 7 of Exiles yesterday. That is, I re-wrote the beginning, and scrapped the one that had been sitting on my floppy disk for weeks and weeks and... I'm sure you all get the picture. It was a good scene but I realised it wasn't right for the beginning of this chapter, when I'd ended the last one on such a dramatic moment. Breaking the momentum at this moment would be stupid; more importantly, I'm not sure if I'd be able to get it back.

I don't know why I've suddenly realised what I have to do with this chapter: I've had the outline written down since LAST YEAR but it's one thing to have all the ingredients written down, another thing to actually cook with them. Nice metaphor? I think so. And so I am going to write this confrontation between the two jade boys and it will probably get very heated and punches might be thrown and objects will be broken. I actually don't think Isamu and Minako will break up in this chapter, because Isamu's just not that chivalrous and Minako's too stubborn and frankly there hasn't been any relationship on show at this point in time. But it will be the beginning of the end: you will see what is wrong with it, not just hear about it.

Song for this chapter: Foundations by Kate Nash, which perfectly describes the situation and might be responsible for rejuvenating me.

You know what's interesting? I feel so comfortable writing this chapter. I feel so happy to be back with these characters and figuring out what they will say and do. I don't think I've ever had that feeling with a story before. Interesting.

This entry will be split into two parts: what I've been up to during this past week and then my 'inner life'.

( Working nine to five, what a way to make a living )

WARNING: graphic description of bodily functions ahead

( Maybe I've been here before, I know this room, I've walked this floor )

And I've been having loads of ideas for music videos, which is annoying because I can't make them, so I'm putting them all in a document and e-mailing it to Dejana. So you might actually get to see them sometime.

Oh and I'll be posting a little sidestory for Exiles this weekend, something featuring Helga so you can get to know her a little better.

They're out!

I've seen the spikes, I've seen the buds pushing at the tips but now I can see the flowers! The crocuses are blooming and spring is officially here! My heart shot upwards in my chest when I saw the first one with its purple petals open to show its golden centre. There are others coming up; hopefully I'll see yellow ones soon. No daffodils yet.

I did some work today - not academic work but honest to good physical work, the sort people in the West do less and less often. And I volunteered to do it. On my bus route, there is a large roundabout which used to be covered with overgrown grass and lots of rubbish - bits of plastic and crisp packets. Now it's been cleaned and has about six flower beds. I helped plant trees, bushes and various grasses. I haven't handled a spade for ages and my arms were quite weak. It was a bit better after I got a smaller spade, though still a strain. I could feel the muscles in my back and arms working as they haven't worked for ages. The wind was cold but we were all grateful for that because it meant we were nicely warm and not boiling. Occasionally the sun broke through the thick white clouds, almost as if winking and nodding at us. Patches of blue sky appeared as the afternoon went on. All the snow from yesterday had melted because of the exposure although there were still some patches in hidden places. Everybody was very nice and there were lots of photos afterwards.

It felt good to do something since I don't have any technical or economic translations to do. I have to "see them (the tutors)" about it. I hate that phrase. It sounds so ominous, though I'm too old to be told off now. They're probably both worried about me. Concerned that I'm not "living up to my potential". I've got a whole roster of reasons, plausible ones - I wonder if I really am anaemic. I don't think so. It was just the iron that was lacking in that blood test, not the haemoglobin, which is different. And I eat meat and fish and eggs (loads of eggs). The bigger problem is that most people in the class have drawn away from me. Not obviously but I can feel it. Living off campus isn't much of an excuse when I managed okay last semester. Must find out from Greg if the quizzes are still going on. Nothing wrong with taking a break on Thursday night and I did promise him a quiz section. I could do one on mythology/folklore, easily. Might e-mail him over the weekend.

Tomorrow I'll go into town and hand in my C.V. to the juice place and try to find my swimming costume. I hate it when things go missing "between" places - you're never really sure where you ought to be looking. Damn, I wish Culpeper's would just phone and tell me whether I've got the job or not. It's over a week since I had the interview. I suppose they'll make me wait two. If I haven't, well, too bad, but at least I can go about applying with a clear conscience and let Arabella and Sophia know if I can meet them or not.

Despite my academic failings, my creativity continues to flourish. I might even think about writing some more of Watching for Wolves. Maybe I should join a HP drabble community. sm_monthly certainly keeps my BSSM muse busy.

Speaking of which...

( Would you like a trim? )